Gamber's Anonymous

1 Did I lose time from work due to gambling?   No
2 Has gambling made my home life unhappy?  No
3 Did gambling affect my reputation?  No
4 Do I feel remorse after gambling?  No
5 Do I gamble to pay debt or am financial strained?  No
6 Does gambling decrease my ambition or efficiency?  No
7 Do I have return to win back my losses?  No
8 After winning, do I have an urge to win more?  No
9 Did I gamble until last dollar was gone?  No
10 Did I borrow to gamble?  No
11 Have I sold anything to gamble?  No
12 Reluctant to use gambling money for normal expenditures?  Does not apply because the bankroll is so small. The bankroll for a 2-4¢ hold 'em game, that should last forever, is $12. 
13 Did gambling make me careless of my welfare.  Yes, The King has been eating more junk food to spend more time studying.
14 Have I gambled longer than planned?  Yes, when losing
15 Have I gambled to escape worry, trouble, boredom or loneliness?   Yes
16 Have I done illegal things to finance gambling?  No
17 Did gambling cause sleeplessness?  No
18 Do arguments, disappointments, and frustrations create an urge to gamble?   Yes
19 Do I have an urge to celebrate by gambling?  No
20 Considered suicide because of gambling?  No

Compulsive gamblers answer yes to at least seven of these questions.  The King has answered yes to several questions, but this hobby is profitable, barely, in fiscal year three, month one.